fear and desire

one of my first 16mm films

got away from the bitter nyc cold and stayed for a spell in fort lauderdale, florida. spent over an hour the night before my flight digging my car out of the snow. it took some time but eventually relaxed, it helped of course that i was staying on the beach and swimming and soaking up the sun. caught up with a good gal friend and had some of my fave meals from down there.

which leads me to my next subject: the paintings of Georgia O'Keefe. Her portraits of landscapes and flowers are amazing but some people like to apply a way of thinking about it that was not intended. 

her response? "when people read erotic symbols into my painting, they are really thinking about their own affairs." 

people projecting and the target internalizing. it can leave you in quite a confused and agitated state, like an emotional time bomb. others pick up on this and if they are mean-spirited they will try to trigger you, sometimes in very inappropriate places. the best thing to do is learn self-defense, practice self-awareness and stop things before they escalate. be firm with your boundaries, don't take things personally and respect yourself enough to know when to fight and when to walk away. sometimes it's best not to go down to their level. but if they keep bothering you- don't hold back.

It's one of the most primal art forms that inspires with a wild, passionate intensity.

Sex remains a source of endless fascination. Chemistry can come in many forms and when you least expect it, you can indulge the romantic or the erotic, either way, it is always intoxicating.

One woman who pioneered her world and her writing in this direction was Anais Nin. Considered a leader of the Feminist movement, her diaries of sensual situations and unconventional sexual relationships captured the imagination of women everywhere, and she has stood the test of time as a culture figure of a glamorous, sexually empowered woman.

Her most famous partner was the writer Henry Miller. known for his erotic, controversial novels as well. Together they published a book "A Literary Passion" which contained intimate details from love letters exchanged between the two.

She became a style icon as well as a literary icon, one of the first to embrace boho chic, with gypsy-like skirts, veils and scarves with peasant blouses, along with lacey flowing dresses and ballerina chic, with fitted neck lines and flats.

              happy 90th birthday to my red-headed grandmother who dreamt of being an actress onscreen with the likes of dick powell and tyrone power. she became a wife and worked as a beautician, had three girls in a two-family home she shared with her sister, lillian, who had a son in the bronx in the 1940's. she embodied the style of her times, with feminine outfits and white gloves in the 50's and beehives, plaid pants and big earrings throughout the 60's and 70's. she vacationed in maine, florida, virginia and spain, mostly the canary islands, and got to see blaze starr striptease.

              she lived the rest of her life near her growing family in yorktown heights, new york then later on in boynton beach, florida. there is nothing like the objects and memories one has that has been passed on by a grandmother.

              we all love and miss you xo

 getting eyelash extentions done again. taking the train to soho and preparing to lie down with my eyes taped shut for two hours, a process that feels very egyptian-like. the way they lasted and the effect of thicker lashes that i just had to brush out in the morning made for an easy and simple beauty routine. 

the difference little tricks and enhancements can do- recently discovered this method of painting a line along the crease- creating a hooded look for the eye- a style popularized by greta garbo then used by 60's icon sharon tate, or exaggerated as a cat eye-line for pop models edie sedgwick and twiggy.